It all lands on me

Nobody asked me to handle it all. Yet it all lands on me in default. I dont want to have to be in charge, looking after, and make sure. Its like being one of those thin paper plates at a potluck and tons of wonderful food..and no you dont get one of those handy plate holders. (use to be woven basket like, now usually plastic) so you get soggy and and so heavy you bend. and all the good things end up in a mess on the floor out of order that it isnt tidy, things all mashed together its harder to see each individual item.. I guess the plus to this analogy is that at least i bend instead of break? but the difficult part is in that untidy mess i must make sense of it and separate out the baked beans from the hotdish and desserts from the salads without any help from someone supporting me saying "well, isnt that a bean there? and maybe some noodles there?" its more like "how the hell did you forget there was dessert in that mess?" That isnt supportive or helpful is it!?! i am not sure how to change this dilemma. how to find a happy balance on my plate when there is no one else to pick up the slack. I think it comes in relying on me for everything knowing i can be my lover and my best friend, i can be the listener and the talker, i can be the provider and the receiver. i am all things. there is no magic person that will take care of me or unburden me, all the answers lie within myself. I can be all things to me. I can select portion size and go back for seconds when i am ready to. Bring balance to the overwhelming and ask for help if i need it.